A New Era

Another post after so long. Yayyyy! This one was actually inspired by my Co-RA, also known as Kiss-pay, CoCo, and KATHYYYYYYYY amongst other names. She writes a blog a day, be it short, be it long - whatever. But everyday she has a post. I like that sort of determination and commitment.

So I'm in a very weird place in my life right now. I used to be one of those "had it all figured out" type of people, but now I'm sort of just anywhere, everywhere - not really here at all, if that makes any sense. I feel like I'm a clutter of mixed emotions, but I can't pinpoint exactly what those emotions are or where they are even coming from. I used to be more chill and relaxed, but now I feel like I'm always on edge and ready to burst. Kind of like what being on drugs must be like, I imagine.

Anywho, I'm hoping that "writing out my feelings" (or whatever you want to call it) will help me clarify whatever the heck is going on so I'm not this fragile bubble ready to burst, you know? This will prove easier said than done, of course. I'm not a "talk about my feelings" type of girl, nor do I like to convey my true emotions. One of my flaws, I suppose, but we all got 'em. Might as well accept them now and work on reconstructing them. My former boss (of about one month) told our team that we shouldn't be afraid to hear criticism about ourselves because it will help us become better people, and grow as people, which is essentially what I want to do. I want to be a better version of myself, and in order to do that, I need to realize and accept my flaws instead of hiding them or pushing them aside.

So here's to a new era and year. Hopefully, I'll make it out better than I started in it.

A Blog Without a Purpose

So the whole "Nousha starts a blog thing" failed beyond reason. Busy quarter, I suppose. Between ARC (which randomly decided to increase its workload by trifold this quarter), applying for RA (longest process EVER, much?), CEC (shout out to all my fav's), attempting a social life (FAIL), school (could I study ANY less?), MUN (fuck, I gotta finish that topic synopsis tonight), and drama which may possibly be revealed at a later date (depending on my mood)....I forgot how this sentence originally started. Oh, yeah - busy quarter. To all my friends who have seen me less than three times this year - please forgive me.

Even now, I have so much work to do, but I just don't feel like it. Blame it on my shotty time-management skills and newfound love for sleep. But, hey, it happens. Oh, and BEST PART - I've totally lost my voice. That's right. Nousha can't TALK. Ain't that an oxymoron, if ya ever heard of one. Probably the reason why I decided to blog tonight...

Anyway, I'm not one to tell the world my feelings; I actually hate when people do that, so that's making it pretty difficult to decide on a topic for tonight. I wonder if anyone actually reads these, be it friend or random creeper. But I really need to get back on the writing horse so that I don't fail my English class next quarter.

You know what - why don't YOU tell me what to write about. Yes, you - the one person who actually reads my blog. Might as well tailor it to what you enjoy since I've been so unmotivated for the past few months (has it been that long? Dayum).

Oh, you know what I'll rant about tonight? Freakin' Oscars, man. First year that I havn't caught up to base with all the movies that have been nominated. I might not even watch it tomorrow (due to lack of TV and sudden influx of workload). But can you blame me? TEN nominees this year for Best Film? SERIOUSLY? I thought the whole point was that the Academy Awards is the top of the notch and therefore hard to get nominated for. Ten is pushing it though; it feels like they just started picking random box-office flops for the nominees. Not that I'm saying a box-office flop is equivalent to a bad movie. I'm pretty sure Titanic made ZILCH before it got nominated and suddenly we had to go to four different theaters to get a ticket for a MATINEE showing. I'm not afraid of change, I'm just opposed to the bad kind. Although to be completely honest, the past few years worth of nominees havn't exactly been as up to par as in previous years; everything is so politically based these days...

But you know what really pushes my buttons (what a weird phrase)? The fact that UP (are both the letters capitalized in this? I don't even know) gets nominated not just for Best Animated Film (which is totally fair), but for Best Film as well! Don't get me wrong, it was an alright movie; not my favorite, but I can see why you all love it. Better than WALL-E anyway (freakin' a', is that how you spell it? Pixar movies and their need for originality...). But there are categories for a REASON. It's separated in order for it to be FAIR. However, I see the flaw in that argument. If we want to separate UP for categorical reasons, who's to say we shouldn't do that with genres in general? Which, now that I think about it, makes sense too. It will probably add another two hours to the program (gosh darn those acceptance speeches...) and possibly lower the credibility and caliber of winning an Oscar (which in my opinion, has already gone down for this year because of the number of nominees), but I can't get over the year that The Departed and Little Miss Sunshine were up against each other. Clearly, both were excellent films (in my opinion), but I felt that to put them in a category against each other was just unfair (I am loving the word "fair" in this blog). Little Miss Sunshine was a clear "dramedy" or whatever you want to call it, but The Departed was more of a crime thriller/I'm-Martin-Scorsese-hear-me-roar type movie. Maybe we should leave that for the Golden Globes, though. I just don't think anyone can pit different genres against each other in one category. When someone asks you what your favorite movie is, how can you pick just one out of all the genres? They're incomparable; what you really end up asking is "What's your favorite genre?"

Random ramblings as usual. Don't forget to leave me topics to talk about in the (somewhat) near future!

April Showers

So today, as usual, I flipped through Hulu to find something interesting (and preferably quick) to watch while I waited for my mom to come back from wherever she had gone. Seeing as how I'd already watched everything (damn me and my laziness...), I scrolled along the movies to see what they were about (why not read plot synopses instead...); seeing April Showers, I almost just scrolled by it because I presumed it would be some sappy, sad love story that, frankly, I'm not interested in depressing myself with. As soon as I caught the word "Columbine" though, I had to stop and read the plot. I figured I'd watch 5 minutes, get bored, and leave (a.k.a. a typical Lifetime channel movie).

Strangely enough though, I ended up watching the entire one hour and forty minutes (all the way THROUGH the end credits too might I add, something I rarely do). First off, I have to let you know that I don't like depressing movies; I think anything that has to do with sadness, grief, mourning, etc. comes off fake, cheesy, and just plain stupid, so I was reluctant to watch it. And that's honestly how I deal with sad things - I avoid them. I'm an "avoider" as termed by Cameron from "Modern Family." But April Showers was definitely something else.

Based on the events of the tragic Columbine shooting, a survivor (not some wanna-be who thinks they know everything) creates a film about the school shooting. And none of that fake-pity-me crap showed up at all. It was pure, raw emotion that really gives depth to what happened. While not following the exact details of Columbine (what movie can ever do that anyway), it captures the essence of the point. How horrific it is to see children and teenagers running for their lives from their peers. We can watch all the news media, read all the papers, hear all the interviews, but we will NEVER be able to truly understand what goes down at a school shooting; however, this film brings you five steps closer.

The fear of running through the halls, of watching loved ones die, of seeing how people react to certain situations - Robinson (the filmmaker) captures it all. You can talk all you want about what you would do during a dangerous situation, but while watching this movie, you feel like you are there with the students, and suddenly it's not as easy as it looks. Making the right choice (Should we stay or should we go left?) isn't so simple as a test question when one way means life and the other means death. I felt like I understood that before, but watching this movie made me realize I sure as hell didn't. And while you may say you would be the hero who saves the damsel in distress and goes back for everyone - watching this movie puts you in their position and, unexpectedly, your real feelings come through, making you realize that you may not be as brave as you think.

I never get connected with characters; I "avoid" that whenever possible. I don't cry during movies (even Time-Traveler's Wife because that shit was just stupid). However, I felt for these characters as they ran through the halls hoping they wouldn't get shot; as they took the back entrance and broke down a fence with a bench; as they ran through the woods hoping that the shooter wasn't one of them or close by; as they called their friends, only to forever reach their voicemails; as they barricaded themselves behind doors, leaving others behind with the shooter in order to save themselves. It was scary, it was raw, it was powerful (words that I don't throw around with movies too often). And I'm not talking about the acting or the cinematography or the camera action - I'm talking holistically, the picture, the idea, the message gets through. There are several story-lines, and they don't all interconnect, but it doesn't matter; everyone suffers, be it the parent of the slain, the friends of the murdered, the friends of the murderer who didn't see it coming. I felt like I never truly understood the pain or madness of it all from the media, and even though I probably still don't now, I feel a bit closer through Robinson's recreation of a high school story gone bad.

The end credits list all the schools and names since 1970 that have been involved with shootings, and I was surprised at how extensive the list was. Props to Robinson for putting together an eloquent and powerful (how many times have I used that word in this blog? Not enough, I tell you), mournful story that even I can bear to watch without cringing. I believe this film gives a whole new feel to the words "school shooting" and I hope that people will get a positive response out of it. Middle school and high school are, for most, a living hell (at least it was for me), and it saddens me to see how horrible our world can really be, that our innocence from childhood is truly short-lived.

The Crazy Haters are At It...Again

Click me for the full news article!

SERIOUSLY. You have GOT to be kidding me. "Brainwash our kids!" About WHAT exactly? About how it's so imperative to STAY IN SCHOOL and get an EDUCATION. Wow, smite me now for suggesting such a satanic thought.

How exactly are the students being "ostracized from teachers?" And how is this "glorifying the President?" Are. You. SERIOUS.

Why is everyone jumping the I-Hate-Obama band-wagon? Now, for all you Republicans, I understand that you did not want him to be President, and I respect that. However, you cannot possibly be arguing this ludicrous notion that he is trying to glorify himself and brainwash students into his plans. Recently, everyone has been trying to find many stupid reasons for hating on Obama. And he hasn't even completed a YEAR, yet. This ain't no Metropolis where Superman saves the day after ten pages in the comic book.

The YOUTH has been such a huge backer to the Obama campaign that this is a GREAT time and opportunity for someone whom the YOUTH has been behind to advocate for education.

Most of you come from good schools with over 90% graduation rates. Well, wake up. There are a sheer NUMBER of schools that don't have such great rates and education. So yeah, this is a pretty good way to start getting kids to think seriously about this (at least the ones who are actually considering dropping out).

And by the way - as for the "guided discussions," those are an EXCELLENT idea. Instead of just hearing the speech and moving on, students and kids will actually get a chance to discuss what they thought and really THINK about what is being said. As poster Willbw put it, "I'm not sure why everyone is so scared that we'll all be brainwashed by the President."

It seems as though we have reached the time when the adolescents' realize bullshit faster than adults.

Harry Potter v. Twilight.

Harry v. Twilight? Please...

Really...I gotta thank Tim Yoon for this. Now, I understand that random people just added reasons, so there will be repeats and what not, but I just HAD to make a reply to each one (at least for the first 40ish). Also keep in mind that I have read all the books for BOTH series (including the half-book from Edward's POV).

Read my reply side-by-side with the article, and tell me what you think! Or, don't. Whatever. ^_^ (I had to throw in an Asian smiley face there).

And here...we...go!

1. I read twilight once cuz i couldn't bear to read it again. i lost count after 12 times of rereading Harry Potter. And no one is good looking in Twilight. BAM

2. I don't think LOVE STORY can be used as a good reason for why one is better. However, all Twilight is is a love story. HP has got EVERYTHING. BAM.

3. WIZARDS DON'T NEED TO BE DEAD TO HAVE POWERS. BAM. Also, I believe in HP, vampires are ranked below wizards. In fact during Slughorn's Christmas party, it was revealed that part-humans like vampires only have few rights. At least HP has wizards AND vamps. Oh, and BAM.

4. You cannot possibly compare Alice to the Weasley twins. BAM.

5. Again, with the hot guys. No, they are not attractive. They are all skinny sticks. One of the greatest love stories ever? Don't you mean Shakespeare's Romeo+Juliet, which is partially what Twilight was based off of? BAM.

6. I'm sorry, HP is not real, but a story about VAMPIRES AND WEREWOLVES is real? And kids who need to grow? Please read books 2-4 of Twilight and do an analysis of Bella's character. BAM

7. Twilight is boring and HP is exciting? I think the person who posted it missed the sarcasm. BAM

8. LOL go back to school and learn how to read. BAM

9. There are zero sex scenes. Please see reply to number 8. BAM

10. Common sense to like Twilight? I feel like I need to tell everyone to refer to reply number 8...BAM

11. Again, you are missing the sarcasm. Can the person who posted this refer to number 8? BAM

12. Vampires is closer to real life? I'm sorry, please pick up a scientific/technological magazine. BAM

13. Excuse me, no one can relate to Bella. Everyone relates to Harry....that's why HP was a bigger hit than Twilight. BAM

14. If your reasoning is that Twilight is an easier read and HP is too hard, that means that your opinion is irrelevant anyway. BAM

15. This person has some *serious* issues with werewolves...And no, Books 3, 6, and 7 had werewolves, so you're actually wrong. What a surprise. BAM

16. "fantasy that is real" LOL really? Refer to 8. BAM

17. Refer to 14 and 8. BAM

18. That "pain" you describe was bitching and moaning. Bella was PMS-ing for 300 pages. No thanks. HP has more depth, themes, motifs, character development....and BAM

19. You cannot use that as the sole reason for why one book is better than another. BAM

20. Bella bitches and moans so much; I hope to NEVER be able to relate to that. Harry Potter suffers loss, being the underdog, confusion - omg basically teenage angst (see Potter Puppet Pals). BAM

21. Seeing the future is better than having magical powers? You do realize that in Harry Potter, there is both...Again, refer to number 8. And 14. BAM

22. Bella is more realistic because she is stupid? Well actually, I'm going to agree with that for the majority of the human race....But not why Twilight is better. BAM

23. Your post makes no sense to either of the books....BAM

24. Refer to 18. BAM

25. Why would you choose baseball out of all the sports in the world....this is about 98% irrelevant to the question. BAM

26. The Cullens would die for each other? Please read book 7 of HP. BAM

27. Twilight's plot is straightforward. Damn, that is definitely a requirement when I want a good, intellectual read. BAM

28. Right, then she got saved by her vampire boyfriend...cuz that's so realistic....BAM

29. The question is regarding the books, not the characters. BAM

30. I would like to think the friendships Harry made are a very strong bond since everyone is, you know, willing to die for him and all. BAM

31. Percy. BAM

32. Weasley parents. Sirius. Lupin. (insert all other parent figures for Harry). BAM

33. Refer to 30 BAM

34. I don't think any of the characters want to stay as vampires purely for that reason. BAM

35. Having to figure shit out is why they're interesting in the first place. BAM

36. No they don't. BAM

37. Avada Kedavra. Oblitero. Bye bye Edwad. BAM

38. Er...no they weren't....vampires weren't even popular for a long period of time. BAM

39. OK, you also have issues. Please come back to reality. Neither story is real. BAM

40. No, not really. They never really fought. BAM

41. This is opinion, not fact. If you are referring to the characters, please. Robert Pattinson only looks hot to you because he plays a hot character. He is in no way good looking. Every guy who gets famous is instantly "hot" regardless of attractiveness. BAM

Rise of Noush Moush

So...I've never really blogged. Ever. And I never had any plans to blog. Ever. But, hey, Nat and Samia are doing it, so why the hell not. My writing's turned to crap anway, so why not practice? Even if no one reads it....darn.

If you didn't catch the incredible mockery in my title, it's a reference to the AMAZING blockbuster hit of GI Joe. That's right...another Hasbro-toy-made-movie. And even though Channing Tatum isn't dancing all sexy and stripping down like he used to, it's a pretty decent movie. If you put it on mute.

Damn, I'm feeling random. Nat's blog template is freakin' awesome, so now I am motivated to think of something cool, too. Too bad I am not feeling original or creative today. I'm actually kinda proud of Nousha's Wizard Wheezes though considering a) it's POTTER, hello and b) dude, the Weasley twins. Come ON, that shit's hilarious. Hopefully I can bring back some of my own wit and charm that I've lost.